ELEGY FOR MY MOTHER

Amado L. Picardal

My heart turned to stone

 as I watched you gasped

 for the last time,

 your eyes blank

 and blood oozed from a hole

 in your head

 made pointblank.

 My eyes couldn't even

 shed a single tear.

 Numb, numb, numb,

 this is the only way

 I could survive this madness.

What used to be

 mere newsreports and statistics

 has finally hit home.

 This is God's unscrutable will.

 Some pious people consoled me.

 Praise the Lord!

 But I do not believe in a God

 who can mastermind the murder

 of a helpless mother.

 What a blasphemy‑‑

 to make God the prime suspect

 for the crime committed

 by men who were supposed to maintain

 peace and order.

This is the will of a rapacious regime

 that has spawned an army

 of thieves and murderers.

 Mother,

 I  cannot imagine you now

 as a mere pile of dust and bones

 in a dark and lonely tomb.

I cannot regard you

 as a mere memory.

 Mother, I can never believe

 that a bullet could annihilate

 everything that you have been

 and will always be.